A little support here, please?

I found that the frequency at which my laundry "did itself" left me needing more underclothes. So after inquiring with a few female friends, I headed off to the local department store to take a look at what was available.

The salesperson picked out a few different bras for me to try on. She told me to let her know when I'd tried them on, and she'd see how they fit. Um. Well, I suppose we were both women, so that wasn't so bad. Getting another woman's opinion might not be a bad idea.

So I was still a little uncertain about the whole letting-someone-see-me-in-a-bra idea, and I guess I dilly-dallied long enough that she started knocking on the changing room door every minute, asking how I was. When I finally let her in, I had my shirt on. At her request, I very self-consciously removed it.

She assessed the fit and recommended the "proper" size I should be wearing. (What the heck, how many years I'd been wearing the wrong size?!)

And then, gesturing with her hands, she asked me, "Can I help you adjust yourself?"

I stopped short and gawked at her. What, like... you want to TOUCH me?

She stood there calmly with her hands clasped.

Yes, apparently that was what she was asking.

After what seemed like a full minute, I very awkwardly eeped, "Um, NO ?... Can you just show me how to adjust myself?"

And of course she was fine with that and proceeded to show me how to wear a bra "properly". Admittedly I learned a few things I hadn't learnt growing up. All in all an interesting experience.

But there still ain't nobody gon' touch me.